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Handling sales objections: outrageous closing lines

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This week many of my customers are in "shut down" mode as people take vacations. So instead of giving my usual sales techniques tips, today's post is about a couple of funny responses to objections from my past. Read ahead, and share your own classic objection handling lines with the blog.

"If I had your money, I'd burn mine." I worked with Tim Mattis at the 2001 Dating Service, my first real sales job, where we put lots of nice folks together in the pre-internet dating era. It was commission only, and people would walk in to talk with Tim and I, who were the only salespeople. For $420 a year, each person would receive a monthly envelope with 6 "matches," consisting of a photo and a little background on the person. When a potential customer objected to the price, Tim would respond: "Oh come on, Jim, if I had your money, I'd burn mine."

"It's so easy to use, even Ray Charles could do it!" Vince Amodeo was my sales manager at Modern Office Machines, where I sold photocopiers, coincidentally my next sales job after the dating service. Many of our sales were made by placing a copier for evaluation at a customer site, training the people to use it, and letting it stay there for a week. We closed 90% of our business that way. Occasionally, someone would voice the concern that the controls were difficult to use, and Vince would get a big smile on his face, hold up his hands, and say "This is so easy to use, even Ray Charles could do it!"

Now these are two techniques I DON'T teach in my telesales training course, but when I sit around with other salespeople and have a beer or two, we end up talking about outrageous closing lines we've heard, and these are the two I usually bring up. What are yours?

Comments

Very interesting to see this on the internet!
Posted @ Friday, May 01, 2009 3:40 PM by Tim Mattis
Thanks, Tim, now you're immortalized!
Posted @ Friday, May 01, 2009 6:02 PM by Geoff Alexander
Very interesting and different post thanks for sharing.
Posted @ Thursday, August 06, 2009 3:18 AM by Sue | Air Conditioning
My favorite opening line on a sales call, was "Hello this is Richard, your 32nd favorite loan officer calling. How are you?". This got the customer to laugh and make the cold call easier.
Posted @ Friday, September 25, 2009 9:19 AM by Greg
Greg that is just brilliant, I am so going to have to remember that when doing cold sales, and its funny the guys in the office are getting more and more sales calls as these poor sales people are really struggling with the recession and no one wants to get into things that are going to cost them money every month and they are getting very irritated with these calls, and my heart just goes out to the person on the other end as they are just trying to earn their salary as I am sure most of them are on commission basis.
Posted @ Tuesday, October 06, 2009 12:41 AM by Wendy Silk Screening
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